Thursday, December 6, 2012

Depressed

life's so hard that no one could see the way i see this world
life's so hard that each path i choose, everyone seems to forbid
future?
oh i don't want to think further
just follow what they say and grave all the dreams
i'm not gifted and let the destiny takes control
My path

The sadness is engulfing me
The walls are closing in on me
Sadness, hurt, and anger permeating the air around me
Choking me with their intensity until I'm on my knees
No sounds to be heard other than my cries
As the pain seeps into my veins bursting through my skin,
Tears of blood run all over me
I'm on an never-ending path
Just me alone, loneliness as my friend in this dark and  
     desolite place.
No light is ever seen, no happiness left.
All there is, is the dark path in front of me with walls that
      close in on me.
And pain and sadness in the air engulfing my very being.

The Dark Place
Cold crisp air filling a dark insufferable room.
This room being more of a prison or coffin in whatever
     perspective you wanna take it.
The doors keeping all hope out as well as anything ever
     positive from entering these four walls.
The shades pulled down for no light will enter or be
     welcomed in.
All who enter see this dark, suffering and hopeless
     place, yet it is home to many at some time.
A place of solidarity and hopelessness.
But a place comforted by the cold walls that close them
     in.
This is their world, their home for they are locked into it.
Once you have visited this place, leaving requires great
     strength.
It is a frightfully lonely place.
But for those who enter, loneliness is already a part of
     who they are.
The time is dull and passes rather slow.
Sleep is an endless hobby for many.
The endless dreams of what may never come brings
     more defeat into this world. 
A world that welcomes all those like them; who sees the
     outside as a hurtful place.
Dreams that may never come true and love that falls
     apart.
Many here seek refuge from the pain, wanting time to
     past hastily so that their "Maker" will soon be met.
The "Maker" , that hopefully, will be the only sign of
     hope and happiness they will ever experience.
The "Maker", who enters this dark and lowly place,
     slipping in through the shadows of this despair.
Some say this world is not for them and I pray it may
     never be.
For all that enter this place are damned to never feel all
     that is good outside or have the desire to.
Some pull themselves out of this place but many die
     within these walls fearful, hurting and lonely.
Again, I pray that you never need see this world which I
     am a regular visitor in.


Scarred
 
Alas the pain of the heart
So deep like a knife cutting
It's dividing my heart into two
Such a sweet bliss that brought this pain
Mind in another place
Thinking, wondering was it worth it?
The heart confused at the answer
Eyes filled with burning tears
They run across my face
Touching my cheeks than touching my pillow
The red eyed monster sneaking up upon me
Crying harder, my voice speechless
No words to describe the feeling
No words could touch upon the full feeling
Nothing can explain it, only time alone can heal the
     pain.

        MOTHER'S ARMS

I wish I was a child again,

Nestled in my mother's arms.

I long to hear "It'll be all right,"

As she gently strokes my hair.

'Cause grownup problems can seem too tough.

Hard to face them on my own.

I wish I was a child again,

Nestled in my mother's arms.






I AM ME

In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me
Everything that comes out of me is authentically me
Because I alone chose it - I own everything about me
My body, my feelings, my mouth, my voice, all my actions,
Whether they be to others or to myself - I own my fanatasies,
My dreams, my hopes, my fears - I own all my triumphs and
Successes, all my failures and mistakes
Because I own all of Me, I can become intimately acquainted with me -
By so doing I can love me and be friendly with me in all my parts - I know
There are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other
Aspects that I do not know - but as long as I am
Friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously
And hopefully look for solutions to the puzzles
And for ways to find out more about me - However I
Look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever
I think and feel at a given moment in time is authentically
Me - If later some parts of how I looked, sounded, thought
And felt turn out to be unfitting, I can discard that which is
Unfitting, keep the rest, and invent something new for that
Which I discarded - I can see, hear, feel, think, say, and do
I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be
Productive to make sense and order out of the world of
People and things outside of me - I own me, and
Therefore I can engineer me - I am me and
I AM OKAY

--Virginia Satir, (C) 1975

Monday, November 12, 2012

Letting Go- Judy Brunette



How do you walk away from someone you love
And take the road of friend;
Can you reroute the course you have taken
And start over once again?

I don't really want to let you go
But inside me I know I must;
The times we've loved . . . the times you've left
My heart says stay . . . but it's my mind I must trust.

We have shared so much together
Laughter . . . fun times . . . tears;
Yet sometimes we can't turn back time
We must walk away, and allow ourselves to heal.

I know one day you will be happy
And your soulmate you will find;
I know we each have one out there
Even if for now . . . only in our minds.

May life be gentle with you
May God's best come your way;
And on some quiet tomorrow
You will realize things were better this way.

Friday, August 17, 2012

All about My Summer

Well, i found some pictures on my Draft and perhaps that's all for my summer holiday :)

       Me and My Brother at The front of Capsule Train to Guang Zhou




The Front of my hotel i had at zhang jia jie


                                       
                           Fantastic view of Avatars Settings



Outstanding Stalagtit with its clever lighting

  The prehistoric things, like document of Chinese kingdom written on wood

             
                   Pre historic instrumental tools of chinese kingdom

I love this dog a lot




Best egg tart EVER !


Random

Happy Independence Day Indonesia :)
Seems this is the worst independence day i ever had, staying and laying on my bed all day with a pinch of books to read and have a mind traveling to fiction world
Others having their own holiday, traveling out of indonesia or some beautiful places of indonesia while mine traveling to my own fiction world, physically boring but mentally excited
The book now i'm reading is highly recommended for you who love fiction, vampires, fixes,warlock and shadow hunter
The book have six series (maybe) , actually i'm wondering this is the last series of book i'm reading. and i thought it ended on series 4 but the story are hanging unfinished on the fourth book, hanging my mind for over a year ! and i just found out it have sixth series which the last will be coming on 19 of march 2013. 
A year to wait :(
Proudly say i've collected all of these series of books charting from
1. City of Bones
2. City of Ash
3. City of Glass
4. City of The Fallen Angels
5. City of The Lost Souls
The writer called Cassandra Clare and if you wanna search for the complete series of the books from the first one it's kinda difficult cause the first one published about 4 or 5 years ago.
Well, I'm done about talking the books
Seems i haven't much time to post any of my pictures, i got no picture to share. 
I was wondering whether i could took some random picture of mine and when the time comes i would rather prefer to watch my movies. oh God, why i'm so lazy these days. Fine, that's all for today. I'm like speaking randomly without point and i didn't get the point why i am typing. so i'm done. Have a nice friday guys

Sherly Suwindra,

Saturday, August 11, 2012

Coming Back

Heelloooooooooo readerssssssss !
hahahhaa, seems i missed a lot of thing to share with you guys, really sorry
Since my final exam last two months i got no time for blogging and got no time for sharing with you
i have been travelling a lot, eat a lot,experiencing a lot and of course laugh a lot !
Oh thanks God !
Actually i had written a lot of my experience in my phone last july, but i lost my phone.
well, actually it didn't lost, but my things had snatched by thieves last month, truly shocked and sad !
I hope that would be my last experience, the feeling was terrible !
but thanks to my family and all the people around me, they cheered me up. i got no idea how to thank them. iloveyouguys !

I held a party too for my seventeen birthday, and i got a lot of surprise. this is the best birthday ever in my life !
Well, thinking about the surprise my friend made for me, is such a shame, how embarassing !
But after all, that is so meaningful for me, i love you guys , thanks a lott.

Well,  i can't post any pictures today. really sorry, that's all for today. have a good saturday night guys :)


Sherly Suwindra,

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Hello Exam :)

Hello Readersssssss,
having a good life ? hihihi
Well, These days is such a good day for me.
I planned each of my wonderful summerrrrrrr :))))
Can't wait till the end of exammmmmm
well, the exam actually starts on 25th may, but i can't help myself to take a time capsule and goes to the holiday first. But yeah, I should pass the difficulty first after i get all that i deserves. Always like this !!
Well, actually i had learned some of the subject. but i'm still not pretty sure of my ability. so i beg for your prayer for my exam, my lovely readers :)
Tomorrow gonna be Valentine's Birthdays and Gonna be a busy sundayyy
After having my Breakfast with my lovely family ,i'll go to have my tuition for exam, then me and anjali will go to the party, thennnnnnn we 're gonna watch avengersssss. I hope my planning goes welll. aminnnn
Oh yeah, i forgot to share you guys some photos that i had promised. really sorrryyyyyy :(
I don't have time to resize it from my camera so i beg for your forgiveness my kind readerss ;;)
Gonna post some photos of valentine's party for next entry, this time i'll keep my words :D


Sincerely,
Sherly Suwindra